I was very pleased to see this news article in my in-box:
Tough Abuse Law Makes Detectives of Animal Officers
“The initial impetus for the training came in 2007 when the legislature created the crime of domestic violence animal cruelty. Because of that law, killing a pet or other animal to intimidate or terrorize a family member or partner became a felony, punishable by up to three years in prison.
"One of the best ways to control people is to control the things they love," Allen County Prosecutor Karen Richards said.”
The Case of the Battered Pet - excellent article about this widespread problem.
I am a fan of true crime novels and one of the things that always freaks me out are descriptions of how an abusive spouse threatened or killed a woman’s pet, or attempted to do so. I just read one in which a man dumped an ancient, indoor-only kitty on the street to get back at a woman for leaving him. (The kitty was recovered safely - the woman was not so lucky and was eventually murdered by this man) I know this is a very common pattern, and a refusal to leave pets often keeps women in dangerous situations far too long.
Horses are a particular problem. Let’s say your husband or significant other has control of all of the finances. You don’t have access to a thing, and you’ve been a stay at home mom, or just stay at home because he said he was “old fashioned” and preferred you stay home (translation: god forbid you leave the house and talk to other men or independent women). Now it’s not just about you trying to come up with enough money to make a fresh start for yourself (rent and deposit, maybe a vehicle if you don’t own one so that you can look for work), but now you’re looking at horses that need a place to live and care that will be three times the cost if you can’t keep them at home. Coming up with the couple of thousand dollars, minimum, necessary to move yourself and horses is no picnic for a woman in this situation. And implementing such a move isn’t so easy either. Arranging to have horses and all your equipme! nt loaded and moved isn’t as easy as you and the kids turning the other direction and not coming home from the grocery store one day.
So what kind of help is out there for a woman in this situation? Some municipalities are on top of this problem! Check out the Annapolis, Maryland Animal Control’s page about foster care for pets and livestock. The American Humane Society offers guidelines for starting a PAWS program to shelter pets in connection with domestic violence shelters in your area. Here is some information about which states allow animals to be included in restraining orders. If your state isn’t one of them, start writing your legislators!
What if you want to help? One page I found makes these recommendations (warning: many horrible stories you may wish you hadn’t read if you follow that link):
- Encourage victims you may know to contact victim advocates or a domestic violence hotline to learn of resources in their community for themselves, their family and their pets.
- Work with legislators to insure that pets can be included in orders of protection and help educate judges about the necessity to do so.
- Work with your local humane organizations or animal control to support the establishment of programs for the emergency housing of pets coming from homes experiencing violence.
- Victim advocates can work with victims to be sure they include pets in their safety planning and include questions about any threats or injuries to pets on intake questionnaires.
I’d note that this is a great thing to get involved with if you want to do something that helps horses and people.
What if you’re the one in this situation? The first thing I want to say is that no one should feel ashamed. Pretty much everybody has been with the Wrong Person, just different varieties of Wrong. Just about nobody leaves when they should. It’s just a fact. The process of breaking free from the Wrong Person takes time and I think I’ve read that most women leave a physically abusive partner seven times before they make it stick. OK, but you know what? The first time, get the animals out. If there’s any way in the world to do it, get the animals out and keep them out and don’t let him know where they are. Tell your close friends the truth - I’ll bet one of them will help you with the animals. If he’s already isolated you so you don’t have close friends, call your local domestic violence shelter and ask them for guidance. Remember, they talk to women in this situation! all day - they are not going to judge you. You don’t even have to give your real name to get information. And information is all over the Internet (use library computers - your home one may have a keylogger already installed if your SO is jealous and controlling). You won’t know - it doesn’t show up in your installed programs, so be careful.
It’s really pretty simple - even if you want to give him another chance, ask yourself if your animal would make that same choice, or if he/she could speak, would they ask to get the hell out of there? I hope you go with them, but if you just can’t yet, get them out - they’re innocent and it is your duty to protect them.
The National Domestic Violence Hotline is 1-800-799-7233. You can always call them!
So today I want to hear from both sides. E-mail me. Have you helped someone in a domestic violence situation get their pets to safety? Have you yourself escaped from such a situation with your animals? How did you do it? What tips would you give others? Are you in a bad situation or a deteriorating situation now, and need help or advice? Unless you sign a screen name to the end of the content in your e-mail, you are 100% anonymous here so feel free to speak freely, and if you need help, I’ll do my best to find someone in your area who can lend a hand.
Today’s Friday Featured Rescue is a beautiful six year old Thoroughbred mare who almost lost her life to an irresponsible owner. She was down to a 1 on the Henneke Scale when she was seized by Animal Control and brought to Days End Horse Rescue in Woodbine, Maryland.
As you see, she has fully recovered! Javie is riding very well and has been out on the trails. You can learn more about her and see video on this page. (And check out their before & after pics for some amazing transformations - HUGE KUDOS!)
Have a great weekend everybody and hey, I got all of the comments up (at least as of this morning!)
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